"Miranda Lambert Receives Overload of DM's from Husband's Midtown Coworkers"
As if love triangles were not already enough, MOS homewreckers assigned to the Godly Kingdom of Midtown South began reaching out to the newly wed country music star and now cop wife, Miranda Lambert, to offer everything but congratulations. Just after the wedding, Miranda was ecstatic to notice she had received dozens of DM's on Instagram from profiles with bio's that read "I PROTECT THIS LINE" with blue emoji's to make their occupation obvious to all. Upon opening the messages, Miranda was surprised to notice that there were not any "Congrats," but more so messages that read, "Hey what's up" or "Hey do you live in Tennessee becuase you're the only 10 I see." There were also multiple Midtown cops that began bragging about how big of a hook they have. "I have the PC's personal phone number," one Midtown pretty boy that has never put his hands on a perp bragged. "Next time you're in the city you should come see a real cop😉," another MOS wife snatcher said. Miranda immediately called the T/S where her husband Brendan is assigned to make him aware of the savagery. When speaking with Timeonthejob, Brendan who was in disbelief said, "These are guys I work with, I can't believe it. Not only did my Sergeant hit on my wife, but so did the CO. I guess camaraderie really is dead." We are told that Brendan was seen shortly after at the Pension Section to inquire about vest out options.
On a more positive note, Miranda plans on having a country music concert this summer at the Rodman's Neck Range to raise money for the thriving facility. The salty Range Instructors who hope the trailer park facility remains intact, will have a charity shootoff to raise money for more ammo. It is unknown if cookie prices that day will remain the same or increase. The Gunsmith Shop will be open and serving Jameson shots to all MOS for the concert. Long waiting lines are expected due to the Emerald Society planning to be in attendance. CONGRATULATIONS AND WELCOME TO THE FAMILY, MIRANDA!
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